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/ The lovely woman-child Kaa was          \
| mercilessly chained to the cruel post   |
| of the warrior-chief Beast, with his    |
| barbarian tribe now stacking wood at    |
| her nubile feet, when the strong clear  |
| voice of the poetic and heroic          |
| Handsomas roared, 'Flick your Bic,      |
| crisp that chick, and you'll feel my    |
| steel through your last meal!'          |
|                                         |
| -- Winning sentence, 1984 Bulwer-Lytton |
\ bad fiction contest.                    /
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      ( / /) _|_ /   )  //       |      \     _\
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                                                                  /.-~